Natalie Whitling

“You will be okay, I can promise you that. However, you will never be the same.”

Q: Where are you located and when was your loss?

A: Palm Bay, FL November 2020

Q: Tell us your story of love and loss

A: Paisleigh was our surprise baby. She was perfect. Every ultrasound, she showed us her beautiful face. The last week of my pregnancy (34 weeks) I noticed she wasn’t moving as much. I went into L&D twice and was already being seen by my high-risk doctor & OB. My OB saw me Friday and said I just had a naughty baby who didn’t want to wake up for the tests. By Saturday afternoon, I knew something wasn’t right. I drove myself to L&D where I was taken back and hooked up to the monitor. There was a faint heartbeat. Our baby girl was in great distress. I was rushed back for an emergency c-section. I had no epidural or general anesthesia when my doctor started cutting me open. My baby girl was ripped out of me and went 19 minutes without oxygen until they brought her back. She suffered severe brain damage (HIE). She was life-flighted to a level 3 NICU 2 hours away. While I recovered, they helped her the best they could. Sadly, by her sixth day of life, the MRI revealed our baby girl didn’t have much of a chance at life. That night we took her off the ventilator and the first time I held her was the last time. She died on my chest. 

Q: What's the best thing someone said to you in the midst of your grief?

A: “You will be okay, I can promise you that. However, you will never be the same.”

Q: If you had advice for a new grieving mom, what would it be?

A: You did everything right. You’re the best mother your baby could have had. 

Q: How has The Finley Project helped you during your time of grief?

A: They gave me a village to hold me up when I fell to the deepest darkest place on Earth.